I miss being a kid

Let me start off by saying I hate blogger!

I know I have said it before.

And I know I have threatened to leave Blogger for WordPress.

But I mean it this time!

All of my reviews that I have posted under my Book Chat tab are gone except for a random few.

I was going to repost them all but I just don't have the patience.

Anyway........

When I say I miss being a kid it doesn't mean I would want to be a kid today.

Because I wouldn't.

There was a feeling of innocence when I was a kid that kids today just don't get to experience.

As a parent I know I have allowed this.

I let my son play violent video games.

I let my daughter watch PG13 movies before she was 13.

But I think technology is to blame.

I love technology.

It is my life.

Without it I would be out of a job.

But kids don't play anymore.

They don't use their imaginations.

Christopher's idea of playing is going onto Xbox Live and joining a group with his cousins and playing MineCraft. Which happens to be the most ridiculous game I have ever seen.

It makes me dizzy watching it.

I should probably say instead that I miss my childhood.

Growing up we played outside.

The usual games like.....

freeze tag

hide and seek

spring 

(kind of like tag but you can "spring" the other players who were caught)

wall ball

street hockey

My house was on a street that had large factories on the end of the block. 

A parking lot

or the "mill lot" as we called it.

Separated the houses from the mill buildings.

It ran between my street Freeland and the street parallel Peachin.  

We were not "allowed" in the mill lot.

And during the day we usually abided by that rule and we played in the street or at the local play ground which was a block from my house.

At night though.

When the mill was closed we made that our spot.

The mill owners locked the gates but that didn't keep us out.

I should say that my street was on a fairly steep hill. The houses at the top and the mill at the bottom.

The lot in the middle was leveled off obviously for parking reasons and this gave it an almost enclosed feeling. High walls with even higher black wrought iron fencing gave it a prison like effect.

The gates were also made of heavy iron as a kid they appeared to be 15 feet high but in reality they were probably more like six feet.

Someone from the older group of neighborhood kids bent the bars so we could squeeze though,

Or they cut one of the spokes at the bottom of the locked gate and we crawled underneath. 

Usually feet first dragging her self across the still hot blacktop.

But you were a kid so who cared if you got burnt and dirty.

Squeezing through the bent bars was always easy for a string bean kid like me but some of my more pudgier friends had to be pushed from the back and pulled from the front.

The allure of the mill lot was that we were not supposed to be in there.

My house was just two doors up so my mother hanging clothes on our line out back would clearly see us so hiding behind the wall was important.

I will say that eventually the mill owners stopped being such hard asses about it and we played freely but there were times when we ran from the cops who came down the street and blasted us with their spot lights. We scattered like cockroaches running out the opposite end .

Some of the things we did in the mill lot were the usual tag, football, wiffle ball, hockey, Someone even set up a basketball hoop.

Your average childhood games

Sometimes we dared each other to "go down the little pit" 

which was a concreted walk way about a three foot drop from the mill parking lot. 

It separated the parking area from the building.

The little pit had steps which made it less scary.

It was dark down there though.

The "big pit"

was a 10 foot drop (this is not accurate but rather guesses) and was filled with kid high weeds and broken bottles and I am pretty sure rats and any other city related rodent/bug you can imagine.

Walking or being dared to run along the wall of the big pit was a big deal.

It was in the mill lot that we played a game called "I believe in ghosts"

I have no idea if this is a real game or if someone made it up.

But it consisted of us all holding hands.

Closing our eyes and walking though the dark deserted lot chanting

.....I believe in ghosts......I believe in ghosts.......I believe in ghosts

At which point someone would inevitably get freaked out.

Swear they saw a shadow looking out of the blackened mill window and we would all go screaming towards the fence and push each other through the makeshift exit.

Scaring each other either by daring to go down the pit or telling a story about seeing a ghost in the abandoned house....known in the neighborhood as 4112 

pronounced forty one twelve.

Or the ghost of mean Mrs. Wendel who hated pretty much every kid in the neighborhood. 

Actually we were pretty sure she hated kids in general

I think my friend Mary was the only one that woman liked.

I loved it.

The scaring people with a story or being scared to walk past a house for fear of seeing a ghost.

I loved it all.

And now at the age of 40 I like nothing better.

My tastes always go to the macabre 

Shows like

The Walking Dead

American Horror

are guaranteed a spot on my precious DVR

Movies like

Possession

ParaNorman

Silent House

are guaranteed a ticket sale from me

Books by Stephen King, John Saul and Dean Koontz fill my shelves.

My imagination is so vivid because I exercised it so much as a kid.

Sometimes on dark rainy nights when I am the last one to go to bed I remember those tales of my childhood.

And I can not run up those steps fast enough.

I even removed the old wooden rocker that used to sit in the Mom Cave because I was fairly certain I saw Mrs. Wendel sitting in there one night.

And she did not look happy to see me.

How about you. Do you have some childhood memories that live on in your imagination?

I am reading: A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness

 

Review of Freak by Jennifer Hillier

So I am back from my 9 day vacation in Disney World. 

I will tell you all about it in another post. 

Right now I want to talk about the second novel by my blog friend and yours....

Jennifer Hillier

I was lucky enough to receive an advanced reader copy of this book.

The day it arrived in my mailbox was like Christmas morning.

I was so beyond excited!

I loved Jennifer's first book Creep and I just knew that this second book was going to be awesome.

Here is the Overview from Barnes and Noble

Overview
Suspense magazine chose Jennifer Hillier’s “truly frightening” debut, Creep, as one of 2011’s best novels, while #1 bestselling author Jeffery Deaver cautioned “you better call in sick—you’re not going anywhere until you finish reading.” Now, Hillier returns to the Pacific Northwest college town where one killer’s stranglehold has ebbed . . . but another sick mind has waited for the perfect moment to pick up where the terror left off.

Sitting alone in a maximum-security prison cell, Abby Maddox is a celebrity. Her claim to fame is the envy of every freak on the outside: she’s the former lover of Ethan Wolfe, the killer who left more than a dozen dead women in his wake and nearly added Puget Sound State professor Sheila Tao to the tally. Now Abby, serving a nine-year sentence for slashing a police officer’s throat in a moment of rage, has little human contact—save for the letters that pour in from demented fans, lunatics, and creeps. But a new wave of murders has given Abby a possible chance for a plea bargain—because this killer has been sending her love letters, and carving a message on the bodies of the victims:Free Abby Maddox.

Jerry Isaac will never forget the attack—or his attacker. The hideous scarring and tortured speech are daily reminders that the one-time Seattle PD officer, now a private investigator, is just lucky to be alive. Abby Maddox deserves to rot in jail—forever, as far as Jerry’s concerned. But she alone may possess crucial evidence—letters from this newest killer—that could crack open the disturbing case. With the help of Professor Sheila Tao, seasoned police detective Mike Torrance, and intuitive criminology student Danny Mercy, Jerry must coax the shattering truth from isolated, dangerous Abby Maddox. Can he put the pieces together before Abby’s number one fan takes another life in the name of a killer’s perverted idea of justice?

Freak is a fast paced, edge of your seat thriller. 

From the very first chapter I was pulled in. The intensity of the crimes leave you with chills and the desire to turn on the light in every room you are entering alone.

Ms. Hillier writes very likable characters.

I admittedly have a major crush on Morris the fiance of Professor Sheila Tao.

It is because of the development of these characters that you really care what happens to them.

The murders and the torment effect you as if you are reading about it happening to someone you know.

I wanted to cry every time Jerry scratched at the scar on his throat.

Abby Maddox is one crazy bitch and although you know deep down inside that she is manipulating someone to commit these crimes you do start to wonder if maybe you might be wrong. 

Maybe she is innocent.

Maybe they should "Free Abby Maddox"

I won't say whether she is or not because that is the fun of reading a thriller like this.

There are so many twists and turns that you just have to keep reading because you have to know......you need to know what the hell is going on!

I highly recommend this book.

Even if you aren't a fan of crime novels you will enjoy the story and characters that Jennifer Hillier has so tightly woven together.

One last thing........

I love the Seattle setting.

I have never been to Seattle.

But Jennifer describes it exactly how I picture it.

Rainy and dark and gritty.

yet beautiful.

Do yourself a favor.

Put down that wretched mess of a book everyone is talking about and pick up this well written sexy thriller!

You won't regret it.

I promise.

Writing takes up a lot of time

In case you didn't know.

Writing takes up a lot of time.

I love the fake Buddhist quote "The trouble is, you think you have time."

I say fake because the Buddha never actually said that but it is always credited to him.

Anyway sorry.

I love this quote because....it is true.

We do think we have time.

Or at least I think I have time.

I think I have time to work my full time job that actually requires me to be on call 7 days a week. 24 hours a day. 365 days a year. The price you pay for working for a hotel.

and

Time to be a good parent who is available at a minutes notice to answer any and all questions. Fix any problems at any time day or night. Being the mother of a college age child means those calls usually come at 2 am because she forgets that I actually don't function on the same hours as she does. The calls are usually very important like "Did you know the Butterbeer they make in the Wizarding World of Harry Potter is just cream soda and butter extract?" or "Can you send me the tracking number for that thing you sent me because I want to know when I will get it?"  

Christopher generally saves his problems/questions for that moment when I just get to sit down.

and 

Time to read

and 

Time to write

I am sure you have all felt the pressure of trying to find this time.

This summer has been especially busy for me.

With Amber off in Disney

and Christopher being a gypsy.....he has had more vacations with various members of my family then anyone should be allowed. He has been down the shore, up the mountains, up to the lake and back to the mountains again.

You would think that with two absent children I would have more time but it just doesn't work that way.

I am terrible with time management.

So trying to set any kind of schedule is impossible.

So here I am completely lost.

Wondering where the hell the summer has gone.

Before I know it fall will be here and every goal I have set will be out the window.

Does anyone out there have any time management advise that they would like to impart to a fellow time thief?

I am reading: I was lucky enough to get an advanced copy of Jennifer Hillier's Freak......and I am loving it!  

I am a bad parent

I try very hard to be a good parent.

But it is just so difficult sometimes.

I would like to share with you some of my mistakes so that maybe you won't make them yourself.

When Amber was a baby she learned to walk at a very early age. 

She was only around 10 months old.

Anyone who has children knows that this is an exciting but also an annoying time.

The reason it is annoying is because now you have to chase this little bugger all over the place.

And they are fast!

As a young single mother, Amber and I lived at home with my parents and some of my siblings.

My brothers Billy and Mark along with myself got tired of chasing Amber all over the place.

We were tired from work and we just wanted to sit down for a second and watch some television.

I am not sure which one of us discovered her fear.

Or who decided to use that fear against her......I am voting Mark.

But I took her fear of the Koosh ball.........

In case you aren't familiar a Koosh ball is a rubber ball that has been kind of frayed so it has all of these tentacle type of arms.

The Koosh ball in Amber's case was red and it had a hard plastic face and hands also protruding from its rubber tentacle body.

So I took that fear and we used it.

We would place the Koosh in the hallway to prevent her from leaving the living room.

We would place the Koosh at the bottom of the steps so she wouldn't try to climb the steps......a toddlers favorite thing to do.

We would put that Koosh on anything we didn't want her to touch, move or look at.

It was great!

I mean it was terrible lazy parenting.

It made my life easier but......It traumatized her for life.

We recently saw one in a store and Amber still had the same reaction after all of these years.

My other example is the annual summertime showing of the movie Jaws.

When I go to the beach I like to sit back and relax.

Catch some rays, read a good book, people watch and talk to my sisters.

Having children ruins this experience completely especially if they want to go in the water.

It's fine if they are content digging in the sand under the umbrella but when they want to go down by the water you have to get up.

And stand down there.

So my solution was to show the movie Jaws at the beginning of the summer.

It helps when they are young if you throw in that the movie was shot at (insert your beach location)

The movie must be shown every year.

Children very easily forget so it needs to be fresh in their minds.

Treat it as a serious safety film.

Not a this is a cool movie.

More like a public service announcement.

Amber always had a tendency to be a little bit of a chicken......I mean she was afraid of a red rubber ball.

The boy on the other hand liked the movie from the very first viewing.

He thought sharks were awesome.

He wanted a pet shark.

He wanted to watch shark week and go to the aquarium to see the sharks.

So in order to break him 

I took him to the water.

As he splashed and jumped over waves. 

His back to the vast sea his face happily facing me.

I suddenly made an Oh my God face and pointed.

He flew to my side and I was like oh never mind I just thought I saw a shark fin.

He was done after that.

Happy to bury himself in the sand and build a nice sandcastle.

Terrible

Horrible Parenting

Relaxing day at the beach....yes guaranteed

but terrible parenting.

One last example.

For I fear if I give you too many you may turn me in to social services.

The Pinky Promise

The pinky promise is a sweet innocent thing.

You hook your pinky to someone else and say "pinky promise"

its very sweet.

My twist to this is that I told my children that if you break a pinky promise an evil spirit will come in the night and steal your mother's soul.

She will live for all eternity knowing that you are the one who caused her torment.

So for instance.

I promise I won't do (insert whatever here)

pinky promise?

When your child knows that the promise they are making is not something they plan to keep they will retract the promise.

You pinky will sit hooked in the air until they revise the promise to something more reasonable.

The boy is especially sensitive to the pinky promise.

He is a Mama's boy and would never send his mother to torment over a broken promise.

The minute the words pinky promise escape my lips he is backing away.

Stammering and coming up with a new plan or promise.

This helps when you really want them to do something.

For instance

Mom: I will let you play your video game if you promise to clean your room after.

Kid: Ok Mom I promise

Mom: Pinky Promise?

At this point you can almost see them thinking.....Shit she got me again.

Please do not try any of these at home.

They are terrible 

and I just wanted to confess that I am not a perfect parent.

I am currently reading: Summerland

Are you batshit crazily addicted to Pinterest?

Hello my name is Jennifer and I am a Pinterest addict.

I am sure you are aware that out there on the interwebs is a site so addictive it should be illegal.

It is called Pinterest.

The idea is that people go out on the internet

or post from their own blog, tumblr or whathaveyou

and find things that they like....

books, movies, clothing, art, animals Whatever

and they "pin it" onto these little boards.

It sort of takes the memory board or wish board or vision board 

idea and makes it into virtual.

I waste a hell of a lot of time on there.

I am embarrassed to say.

BUT there is so much to look at.

and love.

and repin!

Currently I have an addiction to the color blue.

Any variation

Teal

Sky

Baby

Periwinkle

Navy

it doesn't matter.

If its blue....I want it. I love it. I have got to have it. Or at least repin it.

There are also so many crafts to try unsuccessfully to make.

And I say unsuccessfully because hello this shit is legit.

It isn't easy to do stuff.

Even though they present it that way with their little tutorials.

So don't fall for it.

You will end up with a disaster that looks nothing like the lovely thing you saw.

Causing you to sink into a deep self deprecating depression.

Two of my most favorite things in the world are shoes and books.

So I fill my boards with those things.

Oh and zombies.

I have a zombies board.

If you are an author it is another way to market your book.

Get your friends, family, neighbors or blog fellows to "pin" your book on their page.

Then the people who follow their pins will see your book.

Click on it and buy it.

There are times when I am pretty sure that I have wasted valuable writing time on Pinterest.

And when all is said and done I get nothing from this site.

It does not make me more informed.

Or more creative.

Smarter.

A better Parent.

it isn't even entertaining.

but it is fun!

How about you?

Are you addicted to Pinterest?

I am reading: I just finished Gone Girl 

Summer Reading

Hello friends.

Are you staying cool?

It is hot here in Pennsylvania. 

I took a picture of the temperature in my car which I will use to remind myself every time I complain its too cold this coming winter.

This heat is made worse by the fact that I am pretty sure I am pre menopausal because I have been having terrible hot flashes.

But thats not what I want to talk about because I do have at least one male loyal reader Andrew and I am certain he has no interest in talking about hot flashes. 

I have been keeping a list of books that I would like to read this summer.

Some of the books are books I meant to read in the winter but never got to.

I am a little disappointed in how short my list is.

Usually by this time I have a whole pile of books that I plan to read but sadly this year I have no pile and only a few titles written on a scrap of paper.

I thought I would maybe share with you my list and hopefully you can give me a few to add.

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Barnes and Noble Overview:

 On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri, it is Nick and Amy Dunne’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and reservations are being made when Nick’s clever and beautiful wife disappears from their rented McMansion on the Mississippi River. Husband-of-the-Year Nick isn’t doing himself any favors with cringe-worthy daydreams about the slope and shape of his wife’s head, but passages from Amy's diary reveal the alpha-girl perfectionist could have put anyone dangerously on edge. Under mounting pressure from the police and the media—as well as Amy’s fiercely doting parents—the town golden boy parades an endless series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter—but is he really a killer? 

Summerland by Elin Hilderbrand 

(she is my summer reading staple)

Barnes and Noble Overview:

 A warm June evening, a local tradition: the students of Nantucket High have gathered for a bonfire on the beach. But what begins as a graduation night celebration ends in tragedy after a horrible car crash leaves the driver of the car, Penny Alistair, dead, and her twin brother in a coma. The other passengers, Penny's boyfriend Jake and her friend Demeter, are physically unhurt - but the emotional damage is overwhelming, and questions linger about what happened before Penny took the wheel.

As summer unfolds, startling truths are revealed about the survivors and their parents - secrets kept, promises broken, hearts betrayed. Elin Hilderbrand explores the power of community, family, and honesty, and proves that even from the ashes of sorrow, new love can still take flight.

She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb 

(one of my hold overs from the winter)

Barnes and Noble Overview:

In this extraordinary coming-of-age odyssey, Wally Lamb invites us to hitch a wild ride on a journey of love, pain, and renewal with the most heartbreakingly comical heroine to come along in years. Meet Dolores Price. She's 13, wise-mouthed but wounded, having bid her childhood goodbye. Stranded in front of her bedroom TV, she spends the next few years nourishing herself with the Mallomars, potato chips, and Pepsi that her anxious mother supplies. When she finally orbits into young womanhood at 257 pounds, Dolores is no stronger and life is no kinder. But this time she's determined to rise to the occasion and give herself one more chance before she really goes under.

I also preordered Jennifer Hillier's new book 

Freak

which I am excited to read. It somes out 8/7

Barnes and Noble Overview: 

Sitting alone in a maximum-security prison cell, Abby Maddox is a celebrity. Her claim to fame is the envy of every freak on the outside: she’s the former lover of Ethan Wolfe, the killer who left more than a dozen dead women in his wake and nearly added Puget Sound State professor Sheila Tao to the tally. Now Abby, serving a nine-year sentence for slashing a police officer’s throat in a moment of rage, has little human contact—save for the letters that pour in from demented fans, lunatics, and creeps. But a new wave of murders has given Abby a possible chance for a plea bargain—because this killer has been sending her love letters, and carving a message on the bodies of the victims: Free Abby Maddox.

Odd Apocalypse by Dead Koontz comes out 7/30

I love the Odd Thomas series so I am very excited for this book.

Barnes and Noble Overview:

In advance of the much-buzzed Odd Thomas major motion picture, Odd Apocalypse chronicles Odd Thomas’s most riveting adventure to date, as his mysterious journey of suspense and discovery moves to a dangerous new level. The Odd Thomas series is kicked into overdrive as Odd confronts deadly adversaries in a decaying estate straight out of Sunset Boulevard.

And another preorder but it doesn't come out until 9/27 so its not really a summer read is the much anticipated JK Rowling release

The Casual Vacancy

Barnes and Noble Overview: 

When Barry Fairweather dies unexpectedly in his early forties, the little town of Pagford is left in shock

Pagford is, seemingly, an English idyll, with a cobbled market square and an ancient abbey, but what lies behind the pretty façade is a town at war.

Rich at war with poor, teenagers at war with their parents, wives at war with their husbands, teachers at war with their pupils...Pagford is not what it first seems.

And the empty seat left by Barry on the town's council soon becomes the catalyst for the biggest war the town has yet seen. Who will triumph in an election fraught with passion, duplicity and unexpected revelations?

And that is it.

Not much of a long list this summer.

Do you have any you would like to recommend?

I am reading: The Breath of God by Jeffrey Small

Introducing Brayden

I have mentioned Brayden.

He is our newest family member.

Brayden is a French Bulldog.

He currently weighs 10 pounds and will weigh around 20 when he is full grown.

We bought him from the same breeder we bought Perry from.

When Christopher decided he was in need of a new friend he specified that he wanted to get him from the same breeder but he did not want to get another cream colored because it would be too hard if the new puppy looked exactly like Perry. 

He opted for the black/brindle.

Brayden is extra spoiled because we all want to hold him and pet him as we try to 

heal from the loss of Perry.

I took Brayden down the shore with me this weekend.

I went down to help my sister get her rental property ready for the season.

He had a great time.

I walked him down to the beach in the morning to show him the ocean.

He did not care for the sand.

Until he saw the seagulls.

But I would not let him chase them.

Because he wasn't really supposed to be on the beach.

And because seagulls are nasty suckers.

When I told him No! He made this face at me.........

it's his mad face.

We walked him down to the ocean.

He did not like getting his feet wet but we had to at least let him put his feet in.

It would have somehow been wrong not to.

Christopher quickly picked him up and the two looked out into the vastness of the ocean together.

I love how much comfort Christopher gets from having this new friend.

He is enjoying the responsibility of training Brayden and also teaching him all of the tricks he once taught Perry.

I enjoyed bugging my sister whenever I referred to Brayden as Christopher's brother or referred to her as Aunt Judy when I was speaking to Brayden.

My nieces Ashley and Miranda, who were at the shore with us,  took about a thousand pictures of him and posted them in instagram.  

And announced that they were stealing him because he is so cute.

But we would never let that happen.

So please join me in welcoming Brayden to my blog!

Stay tuned to find out how Charlotte is dealing with the loss of Perry and the introduction of Brayden.

Have a wonderful Monday everyone!

I am reading: The Breath of God by Jeffrey Small